Get your PC muscles in shape with Luna Beads!

Luna Beads are marketed as an exercise aid for toning your pelvic floor muscles; an alternative to doing kegel exercises, if you will. They're rather like a large set of ben wa balls, with a silicone harness to keep them in position for optimal effect. Optimal exercise effect, that is, because on the grand scale of things to induce sexual excitement, they really didn't do much for me.

Appearance/Construction: Luna Beads come in a downright elegant and sturdy black storage box. There are two pairs of semi-translucent balls, a pink pair and a blue pair, with a white silicone harness. The kit also comes with a classy little drawstring pouch to store your assembled set (perfect if you want to carry them with you). Everything about Luna Beads is definitely high quality, and aesthetically tasteful.

The hollow outer beads are made of PC-ABS plastic, with weighted rubberized balls inside each sphere. They fit, via molded ridges, into the durable silicone harness (awkwardly called a "composition girdle" in the user manual). One ball in each color coded set has a synthetic loop of string (the "retraction leash"), to facilitate removal.

Features & Usage: Each pair of colored ABS beads provide a different level of exercise. The light pink balls are 28 grams each, and the light blue balls are 37 grams apiece. Depending on the current fitness level of your pelvic floor muscles (PC muscles), you can wear one ball in the harness, wear both 28g balls, one of each set, or both 37g balls at once (at which point you can tell people you have blue balls … sorry, couldn't resist that one!).

According to the user manual (and I do suggest reading it … which is a rarity in the relatively self-explanatory world of sex toys) simply inserting one or two balls in the silicone harness, and wearing them for 30 minutes a day will auto-magically exercise your PC muscles the same way diligent kegels will.

Technique: Put simply, insert the assembled bead/harness set, and go on about your business.

The manual recommends starting with one or two of the lighter-weight balls at first, until your muscles get used to them. Personally, I didn't have any trouble wearing both of the heavier balls right from the start, but if you've given birth, your pelvic muscles might be in need of a little more strengthening than that.

Conclusion: Some women claim their Luna Beads make activities like climbing stairs or riding a stationary bicycle a whole new experience. Sadly, either because I have vaginal muscles of steel or I'm just an insensitive cow, I hardly noticed them most of the time. I wore them all day at work once, and didn't notice much of anything except an ocassional "shifting" sensation when the weighted balls moved around. But, if you consider them more of an exercise machine than a toy, I suppose that's all well and good.

Luna Beads would be more properly thought of as a "sexual health aid" than an actual sex toy. While (apparently) some women find them quite stimulating to wear, buying a set thinking you're going to have the long, slow orgasm of your life would probably be a mistake. However, if you keep meaning to do kegels regularly, but keep blowing it off like any other well-intentioned exercise regimen, they're an easy and relatively fun way to achieve the same effect.

If you're looking for a really exciting way to work your pelvic muscles, I'd suggest a remote control toy like the Cry Baby (an insertable bullet vibe with a remote control … just imagine the mischief you could get into with a willing accomplice!). However Luna Beads are intended primarily as a muscle-toning aid, not an orgasm machine, and the benefits of strong pelvic floor muscles are many and varied! Stronger sensation during orgasms, being able to provide greater stimulation to your male partner during penetration, and improved bladder control are just the benefits that spring to mind… so Luna Beads could well be a worthwhile investment, even if they don't make you weak at the knees!