The very first ever post on this site was about penis size … and for the most part, the same advice and information goes for vaginas too. There's no such thing as a "fat" or "molded" vagina, any more than a guy can make himself bigger by pulling harder when he jerks off. Different women come in different sizes, inside and out. Some girls have bigger vaginas than others, just like some guys have bigger penises than others. Also, if your boyfriend wants to have sex with you more than once a week, it's a good bet he's not bothered by the size of your vagina!

Best of all, vaginas have one MAJOR advantage over penises in the size department: We can improve our muscle tone with Kegel exercises, so our vaginas can squeeze down harder, and feel "tighter" while we're squeezing. (Another bonus of Kegels: Well-toned pelvic floor muscles make orgasms better for you too!) Also, your vagina actually changes during different times of the month! Most women tend to be wetter and looser while they're ovulating, and tighter (but with less lubrication) right after their period.

So, I have two pieces of advice for you: 1. Don't worry about it! You are the size you are, and if it doesn't bother your boyfriend during sex, why let it bother you? (BUT!!! If you ever DO have a boyfriend who complains about your size, just tell him it's not your fault he has a small penis and dump his ungrateful ass!) 2. Start doing Kegel exercises. Every woman benefits from keeping herself in shape, inside and out! Kegels are really simple to do, and you can do them any time, anywhere. To learn how to do them, try this next time you go pee: squeeze like you're trying to "hold it in", and see if you can stop the flow of urine. That's it!

If you have some money to spend, you could even buy a Kegel exercise toy like Fun Factory's SmartBalls. You put them in like a big tampon, and your muscles work to hold the balls in, auto-magically toning your PC (pelvic floor) muscles while you wear them! They make exercising your PC muscles a little more fun, but vaginal balls definitely aren't required to get the benefits of doing Kegels.

Q: if a guy does not cum in your mouth while your giving him a blow job, could you still get an std*? ~Ashley

I put your question first, Ashley, because the answer is SO important. In a word, YES!!! Herpes can be transmitted any time the sufferer has an open herpes sore & you come in contact with it. ESPECIALLY with the delicate tissue on the inside of your mouth or vagina. Genital warts (HPV) can be transmitted by contact with the growths, even if they're too small to notice. Other STDs can be transmitted in the pre-ejaculate fluid (most often called precum) that leaks out of the end of his penis before he orgasms. My advice? Don't touch a penis if you know the guy has any kind of sexually transmitted disease or infection. And if you don't know whether or not he does, don't touch it without a condom.

Q: Hi, me and my girlfriend are pretty open minded about sex, and trying new things, now we both like oral sex a lot and we were wondering if my girlfriend swallow's my cum 2or3 times a day will there be something bad or unhealthy for her? And she likes to suck me for 30 minutes and sometimes even 1hour, is there a problem about that? And what if i make her cum (SQUIRT) because she squirts really good, i mean really a lot and she can do it a lot of times, could i swallow her squirt? Or is it unhealthy for me? And the same for her, she wants to try and swallow her own cum ~Denny

First off, RIGHT ON you two! Damn it's nice to hear from people really getting in to getting each other off like that! :-) And to answer all your questions really simply: No, there's nothing wrong, dangerous, potentially harmful, or in any way bad about any of that. Enjoy the hell out of each other, you lucky things!

Q: What if the guy your giving head to is ghard to please? like no matter what you do he wont let yuo know if he likes whats your doing than what should you do? ~baby-d

Q: okay so me && my bf are kind of in a new relationship…but we often have sex atleat once 2 twice a week. i often go down on him && dont get the favor in return…(not complaining)but even during sex && when i go down on him he makes no noises or face AT ALL! it kills me. it makes me feel like i am not doing a good job. && mentioning it to him he says…"thats just who i am." how can i change that?! ~LDC

It's hellishly frustrating when your partner won't react openly enough to let you know if they like what you're doing. Whether or not you can do anything to change it is questionable. If the guy is just uptight or insecure about his own sexual reactions, you might be able to get him to loosen up by making noises of your own while you go down, like saying "MMmmm" while his dick is in your mouth (which also causes a nice little vibration for him), or squirming around like you're really getting into it, or lifting your head once in a while to tell him how much you enjoy sucking him off.

But if that doesn't help, there are just some people who aren't that active or demonstrative while they're receiving pleasure. Which sucks, but there really isn't much you can do about it. Try not to let it bother you. If he keeps wanting you to give him blow jobs, chances are he's enjoying it.

Q: my bf cums in less then 3 mins after i give him head i dnt swallow i spit but he cums fast Does he like it? THE LAST TIME HE DID ME WAS 2 YEARS AGO WE JUST HAD A BABY BUT DAMN ~Juicy Lips

First off, if you're giving your man oral and he won't return the favor even though you really want him to, he's being a selfish shit. Second off, I'm pretty sure any time a guy comes after 3 minutes of something, he's pretty much gotta be enjoying whatever's going on during those three minutes.

Q: How do i give a wonderful blow job ~Anonymous

Check out my first blow-job post, 10 Tips for Great Fellatio, and if that doesn't give you enough ideas, just click on the Oral Sex link in the Categories list over on the right hand side of the page for more. And most of all: Have fun!

If you're otherwise healthy, and it's always been that way, then it's normal for you. In my experience, the first "spurt" of semen is always a bit different than the last, with variations in between. The thing to watch out for is any change in what's "normal" for you … but if everything is the same as it's always been, I doubt you have anything to worry about.

One thing I feel compelled to add here is never to watch porn and assume it has anything to do with what should be "normal". It's not uncommon in the adult movie industry to have cum "stand ins" for guys who don't shoot movie-quality "monster loads", so don't give it a moment of thought if your ejaculate doesn't look like what you see on DVDs or the internet! (To say nothing of the fact that I haven't talked to any women who are worried about their male partner's semen, unless they're trying to get pregnant and can't.) If you enjoy your sex life, and you're STD free, it's all good!

[added] It occurred to me today that I should add something here: Your level of overall hydration also affects the consistency of your cum. The more dehydrated you are, the less fluid your semen will be.

It's not terribly strange, no. Sex tends to shake things up a bit, and if you've got gas in your system to start with, there's a good chance it will work its way out. The only think I could think of to stop it is to use something like Gas-X a few hours before sex, and hope that takes care of it.

On the other hand, if gas is a chronic problem for you, you may want to consider looking at your diet for possible culprits. Raw broccoli, cabbage, beans and other high-fiber foods are well-known for causing gas in many people. Try keeping a food diary for a week or two, and make a little note in it about how much of a problem gas is for you on different days. You may find it correlates to eating something in particular, and avoiding that food for a day or two before a hot date might take care of the problem!

Well, besides potential emotional frustration, not very much. If you continue to masturbate, especially if a woman masturbates with a dildo, to exercise the vaginal muscles similarly to penile insertion, nothing much is going to change, as far as I know.

If you don't masturbate? I shudder to think of a life with NO orgasms … but scientific studies have suggested that for men, regular ejaculation can help reduce the risk of prostate cancer. The neurochemical reactions to orgasm can also help alleviate depression, improve overall mood, and possibly even boost the immune system.

That said, a lot of religious and spiritual groups have long histories of associating complete sexual abstinence with spiritual enlightenment, and a good many ascetics of this sort live to ripe old ages. Probably more to do with the fact that they also do not drink or drug, or eat to excess, than with a lack of sexual pleasure though.

Premature ejaculation is a surprisingly common problem. Although most men only experience PE once in a while, some unlucky guys (and it sounds like your husband is unfortunately one of them) have a chronic, ongoing problem with PE.

There are a few commonly recommended work-arounds, and the hope with all of them is that the man will get used to not ejaculating so quickly, and be able to have normal sex without worry eventually. If he's had this problem for a long time, there's a good chance it will take a while to fix it (and if he's had this problem his whole life, there's a good chance he'd benefit from professional help).

First, I'll list some methods people use to try and delay ejaculation:

• The "Squeeze" Method: When your husband feels like he's really close to ejaculating, he tells you, and you quickly squeeze the end of his penis like so: Put your thumb on the bottom of the penis, just beneath the head, and wrap your other fingers around behind the top of the head. Squeeze your thumb against your other fingers, and hold it for a few seconds until your husband says he's not about to come any more. Then resume intercourse until he's about to orgasm again, and repeat the squeeze as necessary until you're both ready for him to cum.
• The Interruption Method: When your husband feels he's really close to ejaculating, he stops whatever he's doing and just sits still for a few seconds until he calms down a little. If, as you say, he sometimes orgasms before he even penetrates you, you may need to try something more serious (like the Squeeze) before the Interruption method will work.
• Heavy Condoms: An "extra strength" condom features thicker latex than normal condoms, which helps reduce sensation for the man. (Durex and Lifestyles both offer extra strength styles) If that isn't enough to slow him down, you can also try …
• Desensitizing Cream: Desensitizing creams are applied to the head of the penis shortly before sex, and then wiped off when the desired level of numbness is reached. By reducing the sensation felt in the most sensitive part of the man's penis, he can often delay ejaculation considerably. However, putting on too much of these gels or creams can either cause the man to lose his erection, or cause numbness in the woman. A good way to avoid that risk is to use Durex Performax condoms or Trojan Extended Pleasure condoms, which feature a special inner lubricant that help numb the penis slightly, without affecting the woman.
• Kegel Exercises: As I described in my post to the man who wanted to ejaculate longer, kegel exercises can also help premature ejaculators, by strengthening some of the muscles that control ejaculation, as well as giving the man more control over them. To do a kegel, you squeeze your pelvic muscles like you are trying to stop peeing. Since cum also exits through the urethra, being able to "close" your urethra at will allows a man to stop ejaculation also.

Next, I'll list some techniques that will help you enjoy sex with your husband even when he does suffer premature ejaculation. The really great thing about these tips is that they can also help solve the real problem, because PE is often related to anxiety about being able to perform sexually. If you can both learn to enjoy sex together without even worrying about when he orgasms, it can relieve his possible anxiety enough that it's not a problem in the first place!

• Use toys on yourself: If you can use a little vibrator on yourself, and have an orgasm during foreplay or very quickly after penetration, when your husband penetrates you, even if he comes almost immediately, you've already had an orgasm too.
• Try a cock ring: Cock rings fit snugly around the base of the penis and scrotum. They work by restricting the exiting blood flow of the penis, so a man can get an erection, but it's very hard to lose it. If your husband were able to maintain his erection after he ejaculates, then you could continue having sex long enough for you to have an orgasm also. Then, when you're both satisfied, he takes the cock ring off, and the erection goes away. (Be careful to get a cock ring that stretches, or one that adjusts with snaps, or has another adjustment method to tighten and remove it. Using a cock ring that's too small, and doesn't stretch enough to remove, can mean a trip to the hospital!)
• Don't always "have sex": If your husband can bring you to orgasm with oral sex, or toys, or you can use a vibrator during foreplay, you can both have orgasms without even trying to have him penetrate you. You could give each other oral sex, or he could use a toy on you while you give him a blow job, or he could masturbate himself while he watches you use a toy. The idea here is that you both have fun together, and you both get off, and he learns that orgasms and penetration are not always connected.
• Masturbate him first: If he has one orgasm, and then you fool around together until he can get a second erection, you can have regular sex the second time he gets up. Since he's already come once, he probably won't orgasm as quickly the second time, and since you've gotten a lot of extra foreplay, you'll be turned on enough that you should be able to come more quickly than usually. Hopefully, your orgasms meet somewhere in the middle. If he comes quickly the second time, you can always keep fooling around and see if the third time really is a charm!

The other common way of approaching premature ejaculation is through therapy. Finding a couples counselor who has experience dealing with premature ejaculation may help both of you. They'll be able to work with you to create exercises to do together to help your husband relax and last longer. The downside of professional therapy is that it's a lot more expensive than the other options here … so you might want to try some of them first, and consider counseling if nothing seems to be helping.

This is one of those things that falls under "everyone is different." It does sound like you produce more vaginal lubrication than average, and I can totally understand why that would be annoying (although you can be happy that you save money by not needing buy lube!). But so long as it doesn't have anything to do with an STD, it's nothing to actually worry about.

However, it doesn't have anything to do with vaginal size. In fact, the size of your labia has nothing to do with the size of the interior of your vagina. So, no need to worry about that.

I don't think there's anything you can do to permanently solve the issue, but if it's really causing you anxiety, there are a few of things you could do to help. One is wearing wear a thin pantyliner, if you're worried about your underwear getting soaked.

Another option, for occasional use only, is using a simple douche before you leave the house. Nothing fancy or perfumed, just a basic vinegar and water solution (look for something with a low pH, since the natural vaginal pH is around 4). It will help rinse out the discharge that's already accumulated inside, and delay the build up of discharge on your panties. However, it's not recommended to douche frequently, because it will disrupt your body's normal friendly bacteria, and can make you more susceptible to vaginal infections. Douching would be something to do right before a date, or if you have an important business meeting, or some other infrequent situation where your vaginal secretions cause you extra anxiety.

One last thing to consider is whether or not you wear panties while you're sleeping. If you do, stop. It's important for your genitals to get some "breathing time" every day, and this might help decrease the problem a little. (That's also a good reason to always wear cotton panties, or at least wear underwear with a cotton panel in the crotch. Synthetic materials don't breathe.)

Sorry I don't have a magic solution for you, but hopefully some of those suggestions will help.

I'm honestly not sure. On the one hand, orgasms do stimulate uterine contractions (and masturbating before or during your period can therefore stimulate cramps), so it seems like it would work great. On the other hand, I've noticed that menstrual flow can decrease greatly (or even stop completely) during sexual arousal, so that might counteract the effect of the cramps/contractions.

All in all, masturbation is fun and certainly isn't going to hurt anything, so I'd say it's worth giving it a try!

This is one of those things I must admit I simply do not get … unless you're worried about fertility, I'm not sure what the fuss is about ejaculate volume! Personally, I don't mind a bit when a partner only produces a small volume of semen. To the contrary, men who come all over the place are just making a bigger mess.

Ejaculate volume is one of those individual things, to a certain extent. Some guys come like porn stars, and some don't. (And actually, porn directors sometimes have guys "stand in" for money shots, if the star of the scene can't cum buckets!)

All that said, judging from the number of pills out there advertised to increase semen volume, obviously it's a big deal to a lot of people out there. And sadly, there's a pretty limited number of legitimate options for changing one's ejaculate volume. I looked around, tried to avoid all the pill scam sites, and came up with this list:

1. Kegel exercises While these are most often recommended to women worried about vaginal muscle tone, and folks with bladder control issues, Kegel exercises can also be a great thing for men, sexually speaking. Not only can they help you control ejaculation and generally increase muscle tone and strength, but I saw several sources say they helped increase ejaculate volume. How? Not sure … I don't know if better muscle tone helps increase the body's production of seminal fluids, or if it just helps increase the force of ejaculation. Either way, it can't do anything but help.

   To do a Kegel exercise, just "clamp down" your muscles as though you're trying to stop peeing, or trying to hold it when you really have to go. (In fact, trying to stop your flow of urine is a good way to make sure you're doing it right.) Do them whenever you think of it. Alternate between short squeezes, and holding the tension for a while. Heck, try doing Kegel morse code if you want!

2. Vitamin supplements Zinc and amino acid supplements are said to increase seminal fluid volume. Zinc is especially recommended. Pick up some zinc supplements, and check your local health food or fitness store to find an all-around amino supplement.
3. Increased foreplay The longer you fool around before you orgasm, the more time your body spends building up for it. And your partner certainly won't mind the extra attention either!
4. Abstinence If you're mostly worried about how much you come during intercourse, lay off the masturbation for a day or two beforehand. The less often you ejaculate, the more semen production has a chance to "save up" between orgasms. This may be the least fun option, but it certainly helps.

Now, for the bad news. It's natural for a man to produce less seminal fluid as he ages. You're just not going to ejaculate as much at the age of 49 as you did when you were 19. If you've got money to burn, you could talk to a doctor about testosterone or HGH supplementation. HGH injections (the only form of HGH treatment shown to produce significant benefits) cost a few hundred dollars per injection, and testosterone treatment isn't cheap either. In the end, the first four things I recommended are probably a more realistic and practical way to go.

Well, I've searched all over the place for information about delayed ejaculation and vasectomy side effects, and I'm afraid I really didn't come up with anything. Delayed ejaculation is a fairly common side effect of many anti-depressants, but you didn't mention if you were taking any medication of that type.

One side effect of vasectomy is retrograde ejaculation, where the ejaculate backs up into the bladder instead of coming all the way out the urethra, but I imagine it would be difficult to confuse the two. Another side effect of vasectomy I found mentioned was chronic testicular pain … which is (thankfully!) also not your problem. Other issues that may cause delayed ejaculation are prostate problems, or spinal nerve damage.

If you're able to ejaculate within a normal amount of time during masturbation, but not during intercourse, the problem is likely psychological, and you might get relief through hypnotherapy or other counseling methods. If, on the other hand, your delayed ejaculation problems are universal, no matter what method of sexual stimulation you're using, it's more likely to be a physical problem.

Assuming you're not on anti-depressants, and it is in fact a universal problem, you should probably have a doctor check things out. You may want to get a prostate exam, or testicular ultrasound to look for possible physical causes.

Hope that's been of some help.